Living One Day at A Time

By Roseline Salazar

Courtesy of Eternal Happiness

I’ve been up and down since the evacuation of Afghanistan, still having mixed feelings about it all. Since trust is my biggest issue after my Afghanistan, it has only gotten worse knowing that we’ll be having refugees in our country. Yes, government believe it is right to act on their cry for help at the same time there are consequences and repercussions. For those who deployed to Afghanistan like I was, you can relate to my message here.

I’ve had several negative experiences with both our own and yet the Afghan army. When we went over to the host nation’s side to do mentoring, I got stared down, some went out of their way to touch or rub up on me. No matter how our own troops tried to protect me, one afghan soldier was smart to make it through our army men. My point here is, there will always be a negative loophole even if you’re doing good to others.

I recently heard about a female solder from Ft Bliss being assaulted by a group of Afghan refugees. It is one thing to be assaulted by our own, but now we’re facing another level by these refugees whom we helped evacuate. Yes, extreme measures, such as better lightening and that the soldiers receive medical care and counseling. Not good enough! This shouldn’t have happened to begin with. There should have been better lightening, our females should already feel safe. Male or females know the extent of their duties, yes, we know what we signed up for. But to be attacked on our own base by foreigners who we are helping? Where were the guards watching these refugees? How did they get away from the rest to be able to assault this female? Had it been a male, more than likely they wouldn’t have attacked him. These are triggers that puts me back into my experiences while in Afghanistan. I am in my home country yet having flashbacks from real life situations happening here where we call home, with those who did this to me in another country. Just wow.

I’ve always had a trust problem after joining the military and I can honestly say I still have it and now it’s worse. Not just with the military, more so I realize it’s the leadership whom we take orders from. I received over ten years of therapy but incidents like these just brings me back to my experiences. I know I’m not back there, but knowing they are here, will always strike that sore spot in my mind and heart.

I will do my best to not let these refugees consume my mind because I know it’s not worth it. I will have my up and down days and will just weather it. I pray our country will not have any more attacks as we don’t know what these refugees would do if they decided to go against us. There were two refugees who left for another country because they had ties to the Taliban in the past. Who knows if there are more? I don’t like raising these types of questions or evening having these thoughts. This is where our PTSD gets heightened…. God Bless the USA.